At least if I’m alive
they can expect my ‘best available’
which is surely a better best than if I’m dead
I listen very carefully
and journey with them, mentally
(since I cannot often venture far from bed)
My illness evolution
has curtailed my contribution
But there must be ways that I still ‘value add’
I can put a load of washing through
— I sometimes even fold it too —
so the family is mostly cleanly clad
I screen the streams of notes from school
I pay most bills before they’re due
I remember bin day (almost every time)
And more than once the groceries
I ordered for delivery
have got us out of quite an awkward bind
And when my body won’t perform
there’s still so much joy and warmth
in moments shared just chatting quietly
And it’s actually got me thinking
that I probably am worth keeping,
and I might even be quite good company!
No
A person’s worth can never
just be tallied on a ledger
— the whole transcends the limits of the parts
Indeed
It deserves appreciation
maybe even celebration
that while I am still here, I’m here with all my heart